SEEK, ENDURE, ATTAIN
Girl's Camp 2014

When we were sent here to earth, our Heavenly Father gave us the sweet gift of agency. Because we have been given the ability to choose, it is ultimately up to us to decide our final destination. I have often envisioned what it will be like to stand before my Father in Heaven and be judged for my actions here on this earth. A few months ago, I was taught a lesson on this topic. My mother-in-law entrusted my husband and I with her most prized possession—a necklace made from her mother’s wedding ring. She had left it at the cabin, and asked that we deliver it to her. Knowing how important this item was to my mother-in-law, my husband and I discussed ways in keeping it safe, and then followed through with our plan. However, when it came time to deliver the necklace to my mother-in-law, the necklace was no longer where it had been placed for safe keeping. This realization ensued several weeks of searching and praying for the lost heirloom. Throughout this time of prayer and contemplation, my soul longed for a “redo”. My mind was relentless with the “if only’s”, and the “should of’s”.  I couldn’t help but think of what I could have done, or what I should have done. In the midst of my turmoil, I was taught a lesson. One evening while contemplating the lost heirloom, my mind was opened to a new thought. In my mind I saw myself standing in front of my Savior after I had completed my time here on Earth. As I stood, my mind wondered—will I want a “redo”, or will I have done all that I could? In 2 Nephi it states, “Therefore, lift up your hearts, and remember that ye are free to act for yourselves, to choose the way of everlasting life, or the way of everlasting death” (2 Nephi 10:23). President Monson has said that decisions determine our destiny (President Monson, “Dare to Stand Alone”, Ensign, October 2011). 

The theme for camp this week is: An Island in a sea with the word sea being an acronym standing for Seek, Endure, Attain. An island represents us in our journey back to our Heavenly Home. An island stands out, an island is immoveable, and an island weathers the storms. In order for us to make the choices necessary to reach our ultimate goal, we must have the courage to seek the Gospel and endure the challenges of this life, and as we do so we will attain exaltation.

President Monson said, “Life’s journey is not traveled on a freeway devoid of obstacles, pitfalls, and snares. Rather, it is a pathway marked by forks and turnings. Decisions are constantly before us. To make them wisely, courage is needed… (The Call for Courage, President Thomas S. Monson, General Conference, 2004).”  

COURAGE~ SEEK AND ENDURE

Each of us will face choices that will require the courage. This last year my daughter switched schools just as she was entering Middle School. She had always attended school in the Boise School District; however, we felt impressed to switch her to her designated school district, so rather than attending West Junior High with the majority of her friends, she attended Lake Hazel. Right from the beginning, there were blessings to our switch—the greatest blessings were perhaps the young ladies who did reach out to her, and included her in their group of friends. Despite these friendships however, she still felt much like a new student. That is why it was so difficult for her when her Life Skills teacher announced that the class would be watching a movie that Hailey knew she shouldn’t watch. With pounding heart, a bit of dread, and a silent prayer, she shot her hand in the air determined to not watch the movie. She explained to her teacher her standards, and asked if there was something else that she could do. The teacher insisted that the movie wasn't inappropriate, and further stated that she wouldn't ask her to watch something that wasn’t beneficial to her learning. With determination, Hailey again asked if there was something else she could do? The teacher—a bit annoyed—excused her from the class. As she stood to leave, one student said, “Come on…it’s just a movie”, while others didn’t comment, but looked at her as if she were over-reacting. A bit embarrassed Hailey excused herself, and then began counting the minutes until Life Skills would be over. That night Hailey came home to tell me of her courage. As she told her story, tears rolled down her cheeks—she so desperately wanted friends, but she also wanted to choose the right. President Monson said, “As we go about living from day to day, it is almost inevitable that our faith will be challenged. We may at times find ourselves surrounded by others and yet standing in the minority or even standing alone concerning what is acceptable and what is not. Do we have the moral courage to stand firm for our beliefs, even if by so doing we must stand alone?”  (Thomas S. Monson, “Dare to Stand Alone, October 2011).

The scriptures are full of examples of courage, of men and women seeking the Lord and enduring their trials. I am inspired by the example of Noah when he had the courage to build an ark. Can you imagine his courage as he built a boat on dry land? It took Noah 120 years to build an ark. In that time, he was mocked and ridiculed. How many times in our lives are we mocked for doing what we feel is right? One of the key themes in Noah’s story that I believe relates to us, and our theme for camp is that Noah cared more about what the Lord thought, then what his peers thought. Noah was seeking the Lord. The Lord was very much a part of his life. I think of Noah’s example to stand out, to stand alone, to choose the Lord no matter the consequence, and then I think of my life—am I doing that? I think of Noah’s courage to follow through with a prompting, and then I wonder if I am doing the same?

I love the example of courage shown by David when he fought Goliath. When I was a young girl in primary, we would often have to declare our favorite scripture hero—mine was always David. Even as a young girl, my heart wanted to have enough courage to face anything the Lord required. When speaking to Goliath, David said, “Thou comest to me with a sword, and with a spear, and with a shield: but I come to thee in the name of the Lord of hosts, the God of the armies of Israel, whom thou hast defied. [1 Sam. 17:45]. David had courage not only to fight a giant, but also courage in the Lord. He knew the Lord would help him defeat Goliath. The only possible way for David to have had such an unshakeable knowledge of the Lord’s presence in his life was for David to have allowed the Lord to be a part of his life.  Because he had been seeking the Lord, he knew he could expect the Lord to be with him. Just like David fought Goliath, we too—will face many Goliath’s in our lives. They will not be 9-foot giants, but Satan will most certainly put Goliath’s in our way in hopes of distracting us from our ultimate goal. We must do as David did—we must seek the Lord

I have always loved the courage of Esther when she faced the king on behalf of her people even when it could mean death for her. I am sure that none of us will be facing death, but how many of us have to defend who we are? In today’s world we are becoming more and more peculiar. It takes courage to stand out, to be immoveable, and to choose to be peculiar. Just like the scriptures state that Esther was born for “such a time” (Esther 4:14)—President Monson said, that “He has saved you to come to the earth ‘for such a time as this.’ With His help, you will have the courage to face whatever comes. Though the world may at times appear dark, you have the light of the gospel, which will be as a beacon to guide your way” (“May You Have Courage”, President Thomas S. Monson, General Conference, April 2009). I like how President Monsoon said that “with His Help”; we will have the courage (“May You Have Courage”, President Thomas S. Monson, General Conference, April 2009). When we are seeking Him, and choosing to live by the light of the Gospel, is when we will be able to face or endure any trial that comes our way.   

There are numerous accounts of courage in the scriptures. There is the story of Moroni when he declared that he “would not deny the Christ” (Moroni 1: 2,3), the story of Daniel thrown into the Lion’s den for praying (Daniel 6), the story of the stripling warriors when they declared that “God is with us” (Alma 56:46-48), the story of Samuel testifying on a city wall (Helaman 16:1), the story of Pahoran when he declared “you have censored me, but it matterth not” (Alma 61:9), and the story of Abinidi testifying to his death (Mosiah 17).  I cannot begin to name all of the accounts of courage—these are just a few of the examples in the scriptures. As I studied the scriptures seeking courage accounts; however I noticed that every story with a positive lesson had an element of courage. Every scripture story that ended in failure or sadness was lacking that element of courage.

TESTIMONY ~ SEEK AND ENDURE

In all the scriptural accounts of courage there is a common theme—each of these heroes were seeking the Lord, and they were then strengthened to endure any trial that they faced. And so it is with us. President Monson said, “In order for us to be strong, and to withstand all the forces pulling us in the wrong direction or all the voices encouraging us to take the wrong path, we must have our own testimony” (“Dare to Stand Alone”, President Monson, General Conference, October 2011). We must seek to have a testimony in order to endure the temptations that surround us.

Elder Bednar said that, “A testimony is a gift from God and is available to all of His children. Any honest seeker of truth can obtain a testimony by exercising the necessary “particle of faith” in Jesus Christ to “experiment upon” (Alma 32:27) and “try the virtue of the word” (Alma 31:5), to yield “to the enticing’s of the Holy Spirit” (Mosiah 3:19), and to awaken unto God (see Alma 5:7)” (“Converted Unto the Lord”, David A. Bednar, General Conference, October 2012). Therefore, as we seek, and experiment upon the word—we build our testimonies, and as we build our testimonies—we are more able to endure the trials. As we exercise our agency to choose to seek, we are making the daily decisions that build our reservoir of testimony that will help us endure the trials to come.

When I was a freshman at Ricks College, I had a professor that opened my eyes to the importance of our individual testimonies. She told us that we were all in dire circumstances, and in order to survive—we had to be willing to give up “the less important” things in life. And then, she had each of us pick from cards at the front of the room. A few of the cards were: fax machine, computer, boat, radio, iPod, email, camera … At first it seemed pretty easy to take a few things from our list, but the lesson didn’t stop at a few things. After one round, she stood again, and said people were dying—circumstances where dire, what else are you willing to give up? And then each of us was required to again choose from the list of items: close friends, sense of sight, the living prophet, church organization, priesthood blessings, immediate family, temple ordinances… I remember that as we got down to the last two items: testimony of Jesus Christ, and a living prophet; an argument broke out in our class. One girl was extremely upset at the choice that was being made by the student who was last to choose. This girl begged our teacher to have the lesson stop; however, the point of the lesson was to eliminate all but one. The student who was last to pick was choosing to remove a living prophet arguing that if we didn’t have a testimony, then we wouldn’t need a living prophet anyway. The last card was a testimony of Jesus Christ. My professor then said to the class, “If a testimony is the most important thing each of you has, then why is it so easy to spend your time in pursuit of things that are not as important”. She was right. My time was constantly filled with important things, but perhaps not as important as working on my testimony. In our process of seeking and enduring, we must have a testimony. It is our most prized possession.

In John Hilton’s book, Essential Skills in Living the Gospel, an object lesson is described on the basis of testimony, and I’d like to do it with you now:

There are many levels of testimony:

I hope it’s true . . .

I think it’s true . . .

I believe it’s true . . .

I know it’s true . . .

What if we told you that your ring finger is less flexible than your other fingers? Do you hope, think, believe, or know that is true? What is the only way to move from “hope” to “know”? We must experiment and test it out. Do the following:

1. Put your hands together, palm to palm

2. Keeping your palms together, see if you can separate your pointer fingers. Can you do it? Good, now keeping your palms together fold your pointer fingers over.

3. With your palms together and pointer fingers folded over, try to separate your pinkey fingers. Can you do it? Good. Now fold those over.

4. What about your thumbs, and your middle finger? Good. Fold those over.

5. Now with your palms firmly pressed together and all your fingers folded over except your ring finger, try to separate your ring fingers from each other. Interesting, isn’t it?

So how many of you now “know” your ring finger is less flexible than your others? Gaining a witness of spiritual things is much the same: When we first experiment and act in obedience, then the testimony comes.

Give students the options of some “experiments” they could try (or let them come up with their own). Experiments like, “Say 10 nice things to your mother today,” “Write in your journal every day this week,” etc. so that they can do something and increase their testimony of those principles as a result.

ATTAIN

In each and every one of our lives’ we will have trials.  It is what we do with those trials, which will make all the difference, One of the greatest trials of my life happened when I was a teenager. When I was 17, my elder brother drowned in the Snake River. I still remember vividly the days we spent on the banks of the river searching for his body. I felt like I was in a dream, and that at any moment I would wake up. After three days of searching, his body was found and identified. The process of picking out a casket, and talking about a funeral left me feeling numb to my reality. Despite my unbelief at my situation, I felt an unmistakable peace and reassurance—I knew the Savior was carrying me.  However, as the time drew nearer for the viewing, that feeling of peace began to dissipate for me. I still remember my father pulling me from the viewing line, tears rolling down my face, and admonishing me to SEEK peace. I don’t remember where I went in the funeral home, or much about what happened surrounding my prayer, but I do remember reading in Matthew 11: 28-30. “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your soul. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” As I prayed and read the scriptures, peace began to fill my heart once again. I named this scripture my “Eric Peace Scripture”, and every time I struggled, I would again turn to this scripture and remind myself to seek the Savior. As we seek the Lord daily, and build our testimonies of faith—we will be better able to endure our trials. Because I had a strong testimony of the plan of salvation, I was able to endure. This was not the case for all of my family.

Sister Dalton said, "Take a few minutes to envision where you want to be in one year or two or five. Then take action to prepare yourselves. People don't just run a marathon when they decide to do it. They must train daily, slowly building stamina and endurance to run the 26.2-mile distance. So it is with life. It is daily diligence…that will help you reach your goals. Your daily decisions will influence generations" (Elaine S. Dalton, "Press Forward and Be Steadfast," Ensign, May 2003, p.105). Are we courageously seeking the Lord? Are we choosing daily to courageously endure? If so, there will come a day when we will pass through on the other side of our trials, and we will be on the pathway to eternal life.

It is my prayer that we will be like an island. Let us stand out, be immoveable, and weather the storms of life with courage, and then someday as we stand in front our Savior to be judged—we will not desire a “redo”. As we seek and endure—we will attain. I have a testimony of these truths. I know that our Heavenly Father loves us. I know that He wants us to succeed. I know that this Gospel is true. I know that when we live by its teachings, we are blessed. I know it, because I have lived it! I have experimented on the word.

BE STRONG and of GOOD COURAGE
First Girl's Camp Talk...

When we were sent here to earth, our Heavenly Father gave us the sweet gift of agency. Because we have been given the ability to choose, it is ultimately up to us to decide our final destination. I have often envisioned what it will be like to stand before my Father in Heaven and be judged for my actions here on this earth. A few months ago, I was taught a lesson on this topic. My mother-in-law entrusted my husband and I with her most prized possession—a necklace made from her mother’s wedding ring. She had left it at the cabin, and asked that we deliver it to her. Knowing how important this item was to my mother-in-law, my husband and I discussed ways in keeping it safe, and then followed through with our plan. However, when it came time to deliver the necklace to my mother-in-law, the necklace was no longer where it had been placed for safe keeping. This realization ensued several weeks of searching and praying for the lost heirloom. Throughout this time of prayer and contemplation, my soul longed for a “redo”. My mind was relentless with the “if only’s”, and the “should of’s”.  I couldn’t help but think of what I could have done, or what I should have done. In the midst of my turmoil, I was taught a lesson. One evening while contemplating the lost heirloom, my mind was opened to a new thought. In my mind I saw myself standing in front of my Savior after I had completed my time here on Earth. As I stood, my mind wondered—will I want a “redo”, or will I have done all that I could? Thankfully, my time here on Earth is not over—I still have time to prepare for the moment in which I stand before my Father in Heaven. With this thought in mind, I stand and ask a question—what will we do with our time here on Earth? In 2 Nephi it states, “Therefore, lift up your hearts, and remember that ye are free to act for yourselves, to choose the way of everlasting life, or the way of everlasting death” (2 Nephi 10:23). The decisions we make will determine our destiny (“Dare to Stand Alone”, President Thomas S. Monson, Ensign, October 2011). President Monson has stated, “Life’s journey is not traveled on a freeway devoid of obstacles, pitfalls, and snares. Rather, it is a pathway marked by forks and turnings. Decisions are constantly before us. To make them wisely, courage is needed…” (“The Call for Courage”, President Thomas S. Monson, General Conference, 2004).

Joshua 1:9 states, “Have I not I commanded thee? Be strong and of a good courage; be not afraid, neither be thou dismayed: for the LORD thy God is with thee whithersoever thou goest” (Joshua 1:9).

This scripture has become a motto for me and my family. Tonight, I would like to take the three different parts of this scripture, and discuss them in greater detail. I truly believe as we have courage, as we move forward with faith rather than fear, and as we allow God to be a part of our lives, we will be choosing the pathway of eternal life.

BE STRONG AND OF A GOOD COURAGE

In the last general conference, President Monson spoke on courage when he said, “’Courage comes in many forms. Wrote the Christian author Charles Swindoll: ‘Courage is not limited to the battlefield…or bravely catching a thief in your house. The real tests of courage are much quieter. They are inner tests, like remaining faithful when no one’s looking …like standing alone when you’re misunderstood.’ … I would add that the inner courage also includes doing the right thing even though we may be afraid, defending our beliefs at the risk of being ridiculed, and maintaining those beliefs even when threatened with loss of friends or of social status. He who stands steadfastly for that which is right must risk becoming at times disapproved and unpopular.”

The choice to hold onto our values even when it could mean unpopularity takes courage. Each and every day we make choices. President Monson said, “All of our choices have consequences, some of which have little or nothing to do with our eternal salvation and others of which have everything to do with it” (Monson, The Three R’s of Choice, November 2010). Right now in our lives’, we are surrounded by choices that can truly have an impact on our eternal salvation. Because the Lord knows just how critical some of these decisions can be, He has given us direction. The For Strength of Youth is a guidebook for our lives along with the scriptures. If these resources are used, they will guide us to make the choices leading us back to our Heavenly Father.

The scriptures are full of examples of courage. I love the example of Noah when he had the courage to build an ark when everyone around him was laughing. Can you imagine his courage as he built a boat on dry land? I think of Noah’s courage to follow through with a prompting, and then I reflect on my own life and wonder if I am doing all that I am prompted to do? My niece is serving a mission in Philadelphia, and in each of her letters she speaks of a commitment she has made with the Lord to follow through with every prompting she receives—she reminds me of Noah and his courage to follow through with a prompting despite being ridiculed. I love the example of courage shown by David when he fought Goliath. When I was a young girl in primary, we would often have to declare our favorite scripture hero—mine was always David. Even as a young girl, my heart wanted to have enough courage to face anything the Lord required. I have always loved the courage of Esther when she had the courage to face the king even when it could mean death for her. I am sure that none of us will be facing death, but how many of us have to defend who we are? In today’s world we are becoming more and more peculiar. It will take courage to embrace that peculiarity. And just like the scriptures state that Esther was born for “such a time”—I believe we are also born “for such a time” (). There is also the story of Moroni when he declared that he “would not deny the Christ”, the story of Daniel in the Lion’s den, the story of the stripling warriors, the story of Samuel on a city wall, the story of Abinidi testifying to his death. These are just a few of the examples of courage in the scriptures. Every story with a positive lesson had an element of courage. Every scripture story that ended in failure or sadness was lacking that element of courage. In a recent address given by President Monson, he said, “Decisions are constantly before us which can determine our destiny. In order for us to make the correct decisions, courage is needed—the courage to say no when we should, the courage to say yes when that is appropriate, the courage to do the right thing because it is right” (Be of Good Courage, Thomas S. Monson, April 2014 General Conference). 

BE NOT AFRAID

In order to have the courage to follow these scriptural accounts of standing alone, we must have faith in the Lord, and not be fearful of the outcome. The second part of our scripture states, “be not afraid”. When we are fearful, we allow the world to get in the way of our ultimate goal and our faith is weakened. I think I am just beginning to understand the process of fear and faith. A few weeks ago, I had an experience while at Roaring Springs, with my kids, that has broadened my understanding. 

The day my children and I decided to go was the day the management at Roaring Springs planted decoys to test their lifeguards. While we were in the Lazy River, one of those "testings" occurred. All of a sudden, a panicked lifeguard was pointing, running, and blowing on her whistle. As I turned to see what she was pointing at, I could see a lifeless toddler on the bottom of the pool. My brain went on autopilot, and I gripped tighter to Jacob as I began running towards the child's body. I'm not sure why I didn't let go of Jacob, so that I could better help the child. Jacob was on a tube, and completely fine, but my mind didn't register that I needed both of my hands to better assist the drowning child. Instead, I tried frantically to lift the body with my one remaining hand. I felt alone as onlookers watched my struggle. When the lifeguard finally arrived, she quickly pulled the child the rest of the way out of the water. It was then that I realized the child was only a mannequin—a decoy in an effort to train the lifeguard. I walked away from the lifeguard and the limp mannequin, crying silently. I was grateful to have been wearing my sunglasses. I was hoping that they were shielding my children from my grief. I kept chiding myself for being upset--all the while, grateful that it WAS a mannequin and not a real child. I think this experience was simply too close to home for me.

When I was seventeen, my brother drowned. When he died, I found myself afraid to participate in water activities. My father told me that I couldn’t allow fear to control my actions. He taught me the importance of being faithful and not fearful. He taught me that it was a choice. This experience at Roaring Springs took me back eighteen years to the time when my brother was pulled out of a river, and as I walked around the Lazy River at Roaring Springs, all of those fears came rushing back.

I have a little guy who has had to deal with many fears. I have prayed and pondered of ways to help him. We have spent many hours facing his fears—fears of riding a bike, fears of swimming, fears of sleeping in his own bed. For the last three years, fears have been a constant struggle for my little man. There were times when I thought we would never overcome; however, this year has been a major breakthrough for us with many of his fears. This last week we went to a family reunion in Lake Powell, and my brother-in-law—having no idea of Jacob’s struggles—complimented Bryan and I for teaching Jacob courage. He said, “You and Bryan have done an amazing job with Jacob. He’s not afraid of anything.” I had to laugh. Out loud. And then I felt a surge of gratitude for the Lord’s hand in helping us overcome. 

As Jacob has struggled with fears, I have never related his fears to me; however, after my experience at Roaring Springs, I now think his struggle has partly been for me and I’m learning powerful lessons on fear. There are two lessons I’m beginning to understand. First, I believe fear works against faith. It pulls me away from my Heavenly Father. I may not understand everything in my life, there may be uncertainties, and most definitely there will be bad things that happen--I cannot prevent that. Fearing the bad will not stop the bad from coming.

When we face our fears with faith, God is near. He has offered us that promise. We must be believing. In D&C it states, "Search diligently, pray always, and be believing and all things will work together for your good." That is what faith is all about--it is believing that no matter what happens it is for our good. That doesn’t mean that bad things won’t happen—it just means that whatever happens will be for our good.

The second lesson I am learning, is that living by faith, not fear is something I need to choose daily. When my faith is strong, I feel confident. I am able to face the difficulties of each new day. In these moments, I am seeking the Lord, I am praying, and I am making Him a part of my life. It is in these moments that I am full of faith. And then there are times when I allow my problems to overwhelm me. I feel anxious, and worried—I forget to seek the source of my strength—(my Heavenly Father)—and I react poorly to the situations in my life. I am beginning to think that these are moments of fear.

It seems to me to be contradicting when I know that the Gospel is true (Gregory Clark, “Some Lessons on Faith and Fear, BYU Devotional, May 6, 2008), and yet I have to continually remind myself to choose faith rather than fear. Let me illustrate with a story from the Bible.

On a boat, in a stormy sea—Jesus was awakened by his apostles:

“Master, carest thou not that we perish?” (Mark 4:38).

The Lord calmed the storm, and then asked them, “Why are ye so fearful? How is it that ye have no faith?”(Mark 4:40).

The disciples had sat at the Savior’s feet. They had witnessed the Savior’s power. The Savior was on the boat with them, and they knew that the Savior’s mission on earth was not yet complete; however, at that moment—it was difficult to see past the raging storm. It was explained in a BYU devotional that, “their memories of His works and His words and their hope in the future reality of His promises were not, at that moment, nearly so real to them as the storm…at that moment, the only things they had perfect knowledge of were the intensity of the storm, the fragility of their boat, the depth of the water, and their distance from the shore. At that moment their mortal senses were filled with fear: They could see and hear and feel the threat of their circumstances” (Gregory Clark, “Some Lessons on Faith and Fear, BYU Devotional, May 6, 2008).

The BYU devotional further explains that we know the gospel of the Restoration is true, but what we don’t know is how or when our trials will be resolved. The Lord has promised us that He will be with us, but at times—living in the day to day moments—it is easy to be uncertain (Gregory Clark, “Some Lessons on Faith and Fear, BYU Devotional, May 6, 2008).

Every day we have choices where we can choose to be fearful of the outcome, or we can choose to have faith. Let me illustrate with a personal story. A few years ago I backed into a dear friend’s brand new car. I found myself consumed with thoughts of expenses. Expenses of higher insurance rates and of fixing her car—even a little bump can cost several hundreds of dollars, or even thousands. One evening I was lamenting my concerns to my husband when he said, “Carrie, where is your faith?” I have to be honest—previous to his comment—I had never considered it a matter of faith; however, as soon as it was suggested, I knew I had not been faithful. Immediately, I repented, and I chose to have faith that it would all work out.

When President Hinckley spoke at his wife’s funeral he said, “It isn’t as bad as you sometimes think it is. It all works out. Don’t worry. I say that to myself every morning. It will all work out. . . . Put your trust in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. The Lord will not forsake us. He will not forsake us. . . . If we will put our trust in Him, if we will pray to Him, if we will live worthy of His blessings, He will hear our prayers” [Gordon B. Hinckley, quoted in Latter-day Counsel, “Excerpts from Addresses of President Gordon B. Hinckley, ”Ensign, October 2000, 73; see also “Put Your Trust in God, “Ensign, February 2006, 63].

The Lord is with us! The last part of Joshua 1:9 states, “the Lord thy God is with thee” (Joshua 1:9). I can’t even begin to put into words what our Savior has done for us. Our Savior understands everything we have ever, and will ever experience. President Holland said that His journey was the “loneliest journey ever made” (None Were with Him, Jeffrey R. Holland, April 2009). Not only did his disciples slowly diminish in their support, but Elder Holland also said that the “Father briefly withdrew from Jesus the comfort of His personal presence. It was required, indeed it was central to the significance of the Atonement, that this perfect Son who had never spoken ill nor done wrong nor touched an unclean thing had to know how the rest of humankind—us, all of us—would feel when we did commit such sins. For His Atonement to be infinite and eternal, He had to feel what it was like to die not only physically but spiritually, to sense what it was like to have the divine Spirit withdraw, leaving one feeling totally, abjectly, hopelessly alone” (None Were with Him, Jeffrey R. Holland, April 2009). 

Sisters, the Savior understands everything we experience, and because he understands—we will never be alone. President Holland said that “one of the great consolations…is that because Jesus walked a long, lonely path utterly alone, we do not have to do so” (None Were with Him, Jeffrey R. Holland, April 2009).

When my brother passed away, I had moments where I felt the Savior’s presence, and moments when I felt completely alone. Right after we found my brother’s body, my entire family felt a great peace and reassurance. We knew that a greater force was with us during that time. However, as the time drew closer for the viewing, that feeling of peace began to dissipate for me. I remember standing in the viewing line as people progressed to the coffin, and crying. I was positioned at the beginning of the viewing line, and so by the time the people who came to support our family would reach my parents at the end of the line, my parents were doing a lot of consoling. After a while, my father pulled me aside. He told me that I needed to somehow find peace with our circumstances. He asked me to go pray, and seek the Savior. I don’t remember where I went in the funeral home, or much about what happened surrounding my prayer, but I do remember reading in Matthew 11: 28-30. It reads, “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your soul. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” As I prayed and read the scriptures, peace began to fill my heart once again. I named this scripture my “Eric Peace Scripture”, and every time I had a moment of struggle, I would again turn to this scripture and remind myself to seek the Savior.

Just like we must choose to be courageous, and we must choose to be faithful—we must choose to turn to our Savior. As we do so, we will be carried through our trials. Sister Dalton said, "Take a few minutes to envision where you want to be in one year or two or five. Then take action to prepare yourselves. People don't just run a marathon when they decide to do it. They must train daily, slowly building stamina and endurance to run the 26.2-mile distance. So it is with life. It is daily diligence…that will help you reach your goals. Your daily decisions will influence generations" (Elaine S. Dalton, "Press Forward and Be Steadfast," Ensign, May 2003, p.105). I bear testimony that as we choose daily to be courageous, to choose faith over fear, to choose to seek the Savior, we will ultimately reach our goal of eternal life.

I know that our Heavenly Father loves us. I know that He wants us to succeed. I know that this Gospel is true. I know that when we live by its teachings, we are blessed. I know it, because I have lived it! I have experimented on the word.

Living by the Spirit 

We are planning on leaving for a family reunion this evening; however, in order for us to be able to leave, my husband has had to work many late nights. Last night was one of those "late nights", and because he had ridden his bike to work, he needed me to pick him up from work. After putting the kid's to bed, I walked around the house making sure everything was locked. As I was locking the backdoor, I noticed that I hadn't covered the grill earlier in the evening so I stepped outside to do so. I live in a quiet neighborhood. I have never felt unsafe; however, as I was covering the grill, I felt anxious, and unsafe. I kept feeling as if I should go back inside my home. As I worked, I chided myself for being silly, and perhaps discounted those warning feelings I was receiving.
After locking the backdoor, I went in to my children fully expecting to kiss them goodnight, and then leave to pick up my husband; however, as I walked into their room they seemed unsettled and nervous. The begged me to allow them to come. I thought of all the reasons in which they should stay and simply go to bed. My oldest daughter is old enough to babysit. I have left her home with the kids on several occasions, so leaving to pick up my husband wasn't an issue; however, after saying another family prayer, I felt prompted to bring my children with me. It was then that I started wondering about the feeling I had recently experienced at my backdoor. Looking at the late hour on my clock, I sighed and told my kids to go buckle up. We don't always know why we receive the impressions; however, I know we are kept safe as we choose to follow the promptings. Last night was no exception to that--as we were pulling out of our garage, Amber noticed three police cars parked on our street, close to our home.

I have a niece serving a mission in Philadelphia. Her letter yesterday was similar to our experience last night. She wrote: "Earlier this week I had the impression that I needed to knock on one of the doors with a shaded porch. (There were about 6 of them at the end of these row homes.) It was insanely hot and we were walking to our next lesson, so I almost kept walking. But I've promise The Lord I will act on every impression He gives me, so I flipped around and went to the first door. We met a nice potential. As I walked away I was thinking, "..alrighty. I did it. Anything else?" I knew it wasn't the person we were needed to help. This time I stopped to listen carefully and felt which door was right. We knocked on the door and met Ana. She greeted me like I was her long lost daughter. She hurried us in, gave me a big kiss on the cheek, and started telling me all about her granddaughter and the rest of her family. Then she said, "Would you like a drink of aqua?" I turned to Sister Wood to see if she would like a drink and found her staring at me like I was a crazy person. She looked bewildered. I turned back to Ana and said, "We would love two waters. Thank you so much." Then she looked at me with a similarly confused expression and said, "no hablo Ingles." It was then I realized that she had been speaking Spanish the entire time but I had been able to understand every single word. And apparently she had understood me as well. I stammered out, "Uh... Si. Dos aquas. Gracias." (So by now I had exhausted my entire Spanish vocabulary. Ha.) Throughout the rest of the visit I was still able to feel exactly what she was saying and she started crying when I bore my testimony. I've never experienced the gift or tongues or conversed with angels, but I imagine those conversation being similar to the one I had with Ana. Thanks to the Holy Ghost we were able to speak spirit to spirit. My other favorite "miracle" from this week was when I felt the blessing of my protecting angels The Lord keep promising me. There were a group of people, a family, standing a crossed the street from where we were walking and, Instinctively, I started over to talk with them. Almost instantly my heart was drained of all desire to share my testimony. It was the strangest thing! While I was saying a quick, fervent prayer asking for forgiveness and charity I felt somebody gently grab my elbow as of they were holding me back and reassuring me not to go over. I was filled with peace. I looked around — expecting to see Sister Wood — but I saw no one. We continued on to our appointment, which couldn't have been a block away, and watched as three police cars came around the corner and either arrested or questioned every individual that was amongst that group of people. Obviously I'm not sure why or what would have happened had we been standing with them, but I do know that there are forces, both seen and unseen, guided me and protecting me in this miraculous work. Everyday, if I'm listening, I find that 'his angels [have] charge concerning [me]: and in their hands they shall bear [me] up.'"(Matt. 4:6.)

I am grateful to a loving Heavenly Father who sends promptings and impressions. As we live close to the spirit, we are promised guidance through the Holy Ghost. I have an unshakeable testimony of the reality of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. I know that my Heavenly Father loves me. I know that this Church is true.

FAITH: BE BELIEVING

I had a moment of panic last week while in the lazy river at Roaring Springs. The management at Roaring Springs chose Friday as a day to test their lifeguards. While we were in the Lazy River, one of those "testings" occurred. All of a sudden, a panicked lifeguard was pointing, running, and blowing on her whistle. As I turned to see what she was pointing at, I could see a lifeless toddler on the bottom of the pool. My brain went on autopilot, and I gripped tighter to Jacob as I began running towards the child's body. I'm not sure why I didn't let go of Jacob, so that I could better help the child. Jacob was on a tube, and completely fine, but my mind didn't register that I needed both of my hands to better assist the drowning child. Instead, I tried frantically to lift the body with my one remaining hand. I felt alone as onlookers watched my struggle. One man seemed to come somewhat to his senses, and began moving to help as I slowly worked to pull the lifeless body to the surface. When the lifeguard finally arrived, she quickly pulled the child the rest of the way out of the water. It was then that I realized the child was only a mannequin, a decoy in an effort to train the lifeguard. I walked away from the lifeguard and the limp mannequin, and I cried silently. I was grateful to have been wearing my sunglasses. I was hoping that they were shielding my children from my grief. I kept chiding myself for being upset--all the while, grateful that it WAS a mannequin and not a real child. I think this experience was simply too close to home for me. I have a fear of my own children drowning. I don't really believe that it will ever come to pass, and I don't live in fear of it happening; however, I do all that I can to prevent it from happening. Ever since my children were small, they have had countless hours of swim instruction. When my brother died eighteen years ago, my father told me that I couldn't stop living. He counseled me to love the water, and persevere through my uncertainties. (After Eric died, I had moments of not wanting to play in the water, or to even participate in activities where water was concerned.) Through my father's counsel, I found peace. It was then that I decided to make water a part of my life. I refused to allow fear to keep me from living my life to the fullest. This experience at Roaring Springs took me back eighteen years to the time when my brother was pulled out of a river, and all those fears came rushing back. We have been taught that fear is not from God. We have been commanded to "be strong and of good courage, be not afraid neither be thou dismayed, for the Lord thy God is with thee" (Joshua 1:9). To me, fear is faithless. I may not understand everything in my life, there may be uncertainties, and most definitely there will be bad things that happen--I cannot prevent that. Fearing the bad will not stop the bad from coming. My little guy has been faced with many fears in his life, and what it has taught me is that when we face our fears with faith, God is near. He promises us that he will be with us. We must be believing. In D&C it states, "Search diligently, pray always, and be believing and all things will work together for your good." That is what faith is all about--it is believing that no matter what happens it is for our good. Alma further states that, "Faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things; therefore, if ye have faith ye hope for things that are not seen which are true." I may not understand why bad things happen, and I may not be able to prevent all the bad that will come my way, but I can face life with faith, and believe that no matter what happens--God is with me.

Power of Examples and The Power of God in Our Lives

Last night we went to a piano recital for my kids. One of the students performing was a young man in our Stake who has Down syndrome. He was placed in the front of the room with the other students. His mother sat directly behind him, so that she could remind him to be quiet through the performances. Every so often he would turn around, wave at his dad, and loudly whisper—“I love you dad, I love you dad.” His turn to perform finally arrived, and he was ecstatic. I could tell that music connected with his soul. When he was finished with his piece, he clasps his hands together, and threw them up in the air, shaking them from side to side as he seemed to be shouting, “hooray, and hooray.” Again, I was touched by his enthusiasm, and his genuine love. The last number of the evening was played by his sister, and much to her embarrassment—he insisted on her bowing more than once, because of his pure joy at how well she had done.

As I watched this young man express love to those around him, I thought of his example of pure love. I looked at my family, and I was reminded of the precious gift they truly are. I found myself moved to tears as I recommitted to speak of my love more often, to express it in action as well as word. Sometimes I get so busy with the day to day tasks that I neglect to stop and enjoy the moment. I don’t want the “moments” to pass me by.  

The other day as I was working with my son on his reading, I found myself getting frustrated. Jacob struggles with reading, but he is extremely capable. As we work, he gets better day by day. Sometimes he has a desire to persevere and to work, but other times—it’s just too hard. It was one of those “it’s just too hard” kind of days, and I found myself losing my patience at his lack of effort. I’m not sure what the “best” parenting technique would have been in this scenario, but I know that being impatient wasn't the technique I should have been using. Last night’s recital reminded me of the sanctity of our families, of the things that matter most, of the importance of patience even when it is so hard to be patient. I’m grateful to my Savior for his patience with me. Because of Him, I get to have a “redo” today. The atonement is a beautiful gift. I cannot adequately express through words my gratitude to my Savior—He loved me enough that He gave His life, so that I might continually work at becoming more like Him. Today I will start again. I will pray to be guided, and as I seek Him, I know that day by day I can overcome. I can express the love that is in my heart, and I can be the mom I want to become.

I'm so proud of the hard work and effort my kid's put into their piano this year. Both Hailey and Amber received an award that takes at least three years of near perfect performances at the spring festival. Here's my description from my journal, of what they did to prepare, and the miracles that have transpired through prayer:

My girl’s have been in piano for quite some time. Every spring they play in what is called “Spring Festival”—they don’t necessarily perform for an audience, but rather a judge. The judge holds their music in hand, while they perform. She critiques everything about what they are playing—their dynamics, quarter notes, eighth notes, tempo, crescendos, memory, timing…essentially the song has to be perfect in order to receive a superior. Once a superior is earned for three years, then the pianist is presented with a trophy of achievement. It is something my girls have worked extremely hard to obtain. This year happens to be the third year for both Hailey and Amber, and they have been anticipating the Spring Festival for quite some time. When they received their music, all was well for a time; however, it soon became apparent that the music Amber was being asked to perform was outside of her ability. With only a few weeks left to her big performance, Amber approached her dad for a Father’s blessing. In the blessing, Amber was promised that if she continued to work, the Lord would bless her with the ability to perform. At Amber’s next lesson, her piano teacher was amazed at her progress. At the following lesson, her teacher admitted that she had been worried, and explained that Amber’s progress was a miracle. Amber told her teacher of her Father’s blessing, and her teacher—with tears in her eyes—bore testimony that the blessing had been pronounced upon Amber’s head. That Sunday, Amber stood during Fast and Testimony Meeting, and bore her testimony of the Priesthood power. She explained how she wasn't prepared for the festival even though she had worked extremely hard to be prepared. She bore testimony of the power of Heavenly Father in our lives' when we turn to Him for help. She testified that her progress was through Him. After Sacrament Meeting, while in Relief Society, someone commented on Amber’s testimony. One of the women touched by Amber’s testimony was a visitor to our ward. After the meeting, she asked me to inform her mother (who was in our ward) of Amber’s results as she would be praying for Amber throughout the week.  I was touched by her kind thoughts and her willingness to pray. The following week Amber performed her songs for the judges with very little mishap, and received a Superior on both of her songs. The hard work and dedication had definitely paid off.  With a great deal of relief, I silently put the whole experience behind us; however, the following Monday I received a phone call from the mother of the woman who said she would be praying for us. It had slipped my mind to contact her, so when I received her call, I felt terrible that I had neglected to report. I think I secretly wondered if she was truly interested in the results, or if she was simply being kind. The mother explained to me that her daughter had been praying for my daughter’s success, and needed to know how the piano festival had gone. I was touched that the woman who had said she would pray—truly did pray. I was also touched that she remembered Amber, and I could feel the Spirit whisper a tender mercy we had been given. I was grateful to this woman for her generosity, and thanked her for following up with me. 

15 Years=Memories to Last a Lifetime
Here are 15 of My FAVORITE!
Happy Anniversary, Sweet Heart!

I love my memory of walking to the beach in Seattle, having a picnic lunch, and playing in the sand.

I love my memories of Texas. The wildflowers. Hamilton Pool. Houston Temple. Dallas Temple. San Antonia. The Outlet Malls. Texas Football.

I love my memory of each of our children’s births. Those days were definite highlights to my life. I loved watching you tenderly hold them. I loved seeing you as a daddy. Since the time you first held Hailey till now…you melt my heart with your affection towards our children. And although I have never admitted it previously, I love that they have you wrapped around their fingers.

I love my memories of Sun Valley getaways. It is always nice to be alone with the man of my dreams.

I love my memories of Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches under the windowsill of President Hinckley’s office. Do you remember how we use to call it the “Summer of the Prophets”? I loved that Elder Holland was in our ward. Somehow that felt like a claim to fame. That perspective seems somewhat silly now, and somehow endearing all at the same time.

I love my memory of grass fights in college as I realized I was falling for you.

I love my memory of when I told you I loved you for the first time. I loved how you had to come and see me immediately (even though I told you not to).

I love that you sent me to Paris for my birthday. I felt so loved that you had thought of doing something so special for me. It warms my heart when I think of how you took a week off of work to take care of our kids, and when I think of how surprised I was at my reality of taking such an amazing trip. That trip symbolizes a love that you have for me. I felt like a princess. Thank you.

I love my memories of college, of scraping by to make ends meet, of finding joy in simply being together.

I love my memories of baby blessings and baptisms.

I love my memories of your constant support. Whenever I am feeling less than who I am, you have always built me. You lift me, and remind me of who I am. When I am with you, I feel I can conquer any trial that comes my way.

Do you remember when we started squeezing each others’ hands three times to represent “I love you”? It was in a devotional at Ricks College. I love that we still do that tradition to this day.

I love my memories of your patience as we do another idea I have created for our family. You have never complained. You have only supported. Many times these traditions mean that our children are going to bed late, and yet—you smile and support. I love that! You have always done that, and you continue to do that!!

I love my memories of past and of now when you supported me in my callings. As you know, I do not know how to do anything “small”. You have never complained when my calling took me away. There were weeks when I attended three or four different activities for my young women, and you never once complained—you only helped me to make it possible…even when that meant cereal and milk for dinner.)

My favorite memory of us is the moments we have spent coming closer to God—reading our scriptures, and saying our prayers—as a couple, and as a family. You offer me strength when you put your highest priority in the things that matter most. I remember when we were newlyweds, I asked you if you loved me, or if you loved God more. I think I selfishly wanted the answer to be me. How foolish I was. You taught me a lesson that day about the importance of Heavenly Father in our lives, and I remember working hard, so that I could also say that I loved my Heavenly Father more. You have always put Heavenly Father as top priority, and as you have—you have taught me. Do you remember the time when you were working crazy hours in Seattle, and you had home teaching to do? Here is how I described it in my journal: Perspective is a funny thing. With each new experience in life, our perspectives change, and so do we. Each new experience expands our minds like the ray of the sun creeping across the floor. When Bryan and I were still in school, I remember feeling we never had time for one another. I couldn't wait until Bryan started working, and we would have—what I thought—all the time in the world. However, when Bryan landed his first job, it was with a big five firm in Seattle, and the hours required of him were not what I was expecting. The hours that he was required to put into his job were incredibly hard on me—we definitely did not have the "all the time in the world" as I was expecting. When Amber was a newborn baby, I remember pacing the floors with her, and watching the clock. There were times when I had to remind myself that he was working, so he could provide for our family. Sometimes I simply didn't understand why his work would require so much of his time. One evening after a particularly hard week, Bryan came home early, so he could go home teaching. I remember sitting on the stairs of our home, as he was preparing to leave, and begging him to stay. With his hand on the doorknob, Bryan slowly turned. He looked into my tear-stained face, and slowly walked up the stairs to where I sat. He crouched down beside me, and lifted my chin with his finger. We hugged for a moment, and then he said something I will never forget. He said, “What kind of man would you have me to be? I want to be with you too, but I know the Lord has called me elsewhere. You decide. What kind of man would you have me to be?” In that moment I knew what I wanted for him, and for our family. I knew I wanted him to serve the Lord, and I was grateful that I had married a man that would put the Lord first—even when I felt it was difficult. My perspective changed that day. I gained an understanding of putting the most important things first.

 I know that we are not perfect, but you make us a little bit better every day. 

SCRIPTURE POWER

I don't want to forget Jacob and bedtime. For a long time he was scared to go to bed for fear of having a nightmare. One night his sister turned on the scriptures while she was watching him, and ever since he hasn't been scared. He has said things like: "I feel the spirit with the scriptures", and he has admonished his friends on the way to school "to also listen...they'll make you happy". He truly is excited too! He pulls his scriptures out all of the time, and while he is playing, he wants to listen. The other night morning he woke up and announced, "I finished The Book of Mormon last night. I stayed up until I heard our favorite scripture about coming to Christ and then it was over". I thought that he might lose interest when he had read/listened to the entire book, but he hasn't. The other night he was so thrilled when he was going to bed, he excitedly told Amber that "Nephi was going to make it to the promised land". The biggest thing for me is that I know God answers prayers. It might not be in our timing, but He does answer. Both my prayers and Jake's prayers have been answered with this experience. Jacob has had a lot of fears, and I have prayed for help in helping him overcome--this is a tender mercy in our lives. In Jacob's nightly prayers, he use to pray to not have bad dreams, he use to beg me to stay by his side, he use cry before bed... I simply do not want to forget the blessing of answered prayers.... And also that he wears his Davy Crocket hat to bed (so funny).