Perceptions

Pajamas and Pigtails

It is pajama day at school today (in honor of Red Ribbon Week). When Hailey woke up, she was building her courage to wear pajama pants. However, both her sister and I asked about her attire and she waffled. It wasn't my intent to cause her to question. I was simply wanting to know which pajamas she preferred. I really wish she would have worn them. I think it is a goal of every mother as well as a personal lifelong lesson to teach her children and herself that it doesn't matter what other people think. I hate that we sometimes base our actions on what we feel others may perceive. This is the exact reason Hailey didn't want to wear her pajama pants.

When I was in high school I had a friend who made fun of a girl because she was wearing pigtails in her hair. To spite him, I wore pigtails the next day. I remember feeling awkward, and worrying about what others were thinking; however, I wanted to prove a point that it really didn't matter what people thought. I remember him being shocked, and teasing me for trying to prove a point. I remember him saying, "Carrie, what are you doing? Why are you wearing pigtails? Stop trying to prove a point." However, the point was made--he knew it, and I knew it. We should act in a way that is right by ourselves and right by the Savior--nobody else matters. 

I know my children are aware of the opinion that counts. I know that they seek after His opinion above anything else. I am not worried about them in this respect. I do; however, feel that we need to fight the temptation to conform our actions to the crowd's opinion. We should act according to our own conscience. 

Life Lessons

SOCCER

There have been a lot of life lessons this year with soccer. Bryan decided to coach this year, so this group of girls could stay together for another two seasons. They are a rock solid team. When they are playing to their ability, they are truly unstoppable--their passes and shots are precise, and they work together as a fluid team. For the entire season, Revolution (Hailey's and Bryan's team name) remained the number 1 team. However, their winning streak slowed after having a two week bye. Just before tournament they lost two games, which put them in 2nd place entering the tournament.  In 2nd place, the road to the championship game was more difficult. In order to make it to the championship, these girls would have to play Thursday night, Friday night, & Saturday morning.  Both Thursday and Friday were strong games for the girls. They beat their opponents 6-0, and then 7-0. They were determined to win, not only for themselves, but also for another team. The Outlaw's had played earlier in the week, and due to some poor calls, they had been eliminated for the time being. Our team was determined to put the Outlaw's back into the tournament. Bryan encouraged the girls to beat their opponents for this other team. The girls didn't disappoint--they succeeded in two shut-out games--securing a spot for the Outlaw's team. When they played with that goal in mind, they were unbeatable. It was simply amazing to watch them. (When they played for the Outlaw's, these girls were not focused on themselves--sure, they wanted to win for themselves, but they also wanted to win for someone else. It was a lesson on teamwork and sportsmanship and charity.)  I am proud of Revolution. By helping another team make it to the championship game, they proved what kind of team they truly are--a team with class.

On Saturday morning, Revolution was ready to enter the semi-finals, and this time they were playing for themselves.  The girls outplayed Reign; however, the end score didn't show the results of their labors--they lost in the semi-finals. All 13 girls gathered as a team to discuss the end to their season. Tears rolled down their cheeks as they looked to my husband for reassurance. As Bryan looked at their tear-stained faces, his voice cracked with emotion when he proclaimed, "This one is on me girls. This one is on me. Don't you dare blame yourselves. Blame me." Bryan later recounted that his heart ached as he saw the girl's disappointment. He understood their disappointment, because he felt it too. He just didn't want them walking away being disappointed in themselves. After all, they had played their hearts out, and they had had an amazing season. For these girls, it was more than just a game. These girls had put it all on the line. They put their whole hearts and souls into the game. Somehow Bryan had to reassure them that it was enough. It was his job as a coach--he had to remind them that losing a game did not define a player.  And that's exactly what he did. He knelt down and talked with them. He talked with them as a whole group--pointing out their moments of success; and then he talked to them individually--calling out individual successes of each and every player. He let them know that he was proud of them, and he then gave them hope to come out even stronger the following season. Each girl looked to him for strength, and he delivered. This was a lesson about hard work and disappointment. It was a life lesson. Sometimes in life, we don't get to choose the outcome of our situations. When this happens, there is always a silver lining--we just have to be willing to find it. 

To be honest, I am grateful that our team lost. We have been in the championship game ever since we became REVOLUTION. It was almost an expectation that we would make the championship game--not only from ourselves, but from the other teams as well. Losing in the semi-finals was a good lesson on losing with class. A member of the Outlaw team said it like this:  "Not everybody can win, but when you lose, its how you lose that makes you a winner." She is absolutely correct. It's okay to be disappointed, but then we must pick ourselves up despite the disappointment. We must put a smile on our face. We must congratulate the other team. We must hold our heads high. Losing with class is just as important as winning with class. Besides that, when you do your best--you are always a winner.

On Sunday, the day after the tournament, I was teaching a lesson on "Coming Unto Christ", and my mind made a correlation with my church topic and soccer. I couldn't help but thinking of all the time and effort that went into practicing and playing soccer. Two nights a week and every Saturday for two months, was consumed by soccer.  Behind the scenes, a coach prepared game plans, line ups, and practice drills. Hours and hours of effort was put into a game. As I was preparing my thoughts on "Coming Unto Christ", my mind wondered what it would be like if we put as much time and energy into knowing Christ as we put into playing a game. I had an epiphany on the things that matter most in our lives. Was I putting enough time and effort into the things that were most important? If not, what should I change?